In Quite the Pickle
by SeeASea
Summary: There are plenty of fish in the sea. Or, for Claire at least, a kappa in the lake. (Kappa X Claire; Kappa's Perspective)
1. The Humans Have a Picnic

The Humans Have a Picnic

* * *

The girl with the yellow hair fished me up. The gall! I fumbled trying to pull out the infernal hook, and so she beckoned me over to the shore and removed it for me. Her friends almost saw me, but they were too busy leaving their sandwich bags and plastic forks floating in the water. If the weather wasn't keeping the lake so cool, I would be burning up with anger and embarrassment. Me, the Kappa, the guardian of this lake, to be fished up by some puny human with annoyingly huge eyes! How she gaped at me! Ugh... It will be no picnic figuring out what to do with their refuse… At least she didn't just cut the line and leave all of her bobbers and line! Wasteful, ignorant humans…


	2. The Girl Did Some Research

The Girl Did Some Research

* * *

The spring was just starting to really transform this lake of mine, the sun was sweeping in, the fish were happy and their scales gleamed… and for a moment I didn't think it could get any better: a cucumber floated before my eyes! I turned my eyes to the surface to discover the source of this mysterious blessing, and I saw a wobbly figure—yellow and blue. Yellow hair. Blue overalls. I raced to the surface in a fit of rage.

I should have given it a moment of consideration, for as soon as I lifted my head above the water I heard a gasp, a laugh, and then an enthusiastic gush of words: "You're the Kappa! I'm so, so, SO sorry for hooking you the other day. I found a book in the library, and I asked the Goddess about you, and… well, you like cucumbers! So… apology accepted?"

I looked at her for a moment, at a loss for words, and then sunk back under the water. From the lakebed I saw her shoulders sink. Then, even from that depth, I heard a laugh. I almost lost my appetite for the cucumber, but once the afternoon cooled down I relished it.


	3. The Glories of Refrigeration

The Glories of Refrigeration

* * *

She absolutely would not leave me alone. Even when the season for cucumbers came to its abrupt Mineral Town end and the summer heated up my lake in the span of only a few days, cucumbers would continue to fall into the crystal clear water. Crystal clear no thanks to her human friends, who only frequented the shore more-I had to contend with slimy sunscreen and forsaken ice cream cones now. But those gloriously cool cucumbers... I always surfaced when she came but only to attempt warding her off. Attempt, because it was futile. How I hated feeling that my efforts were coming to naught! Regardless... One day I had to ask. "Not Spring. How do you have these?"

Those saucers of eyes she had lit up and she replied, "I have a refrigerator! So I can save these delicious cucumbers all year round!"

I did not like the sound of that, "Not natural."

She frowned, and I noticed that her whole expression frowned. It was not a shallow feeling. But then her smile returned, "Well... it is as though I lived in a cold region all year long, and I could put all of these veggies into the ice! So they stay fresh-not forever, mind you, but long enough to make plenty of delicious meals! And... to bring these to you!"

My mouth watered and the smile stole over my face in spite of my best efforts to conceal it. She laughed again and it was a rather beautiful laugh. It reminded me of birdsong. I clenched my webbed fingers to reclaim my mind and declared, "You're annoying. Don't come back."

I resurfaced and watched her from behind the mine entrance. She tapped the shoulder of serious young man who was walking away with a dark haired girl and pointed to a few napkins sticking to the grass. He picked them up and the three of them left. Hmm...


	4. An Impending Absence

An Impending Absence

* * *

On one particularly fine summer day, the sun glinting on all of the lazy waves at the surface of the lake, another cucumber settled into my green palms. I sighed through the gills and pushed off the bottom, ready to tell her once again to stop returning. When I rested my arms on the grass I was shocked. A human picnic blanket, a gaudy white and red, and the farmer girl, lying on her back and gawking at me upside down.

"I know, I know... Don't come back. Well, you've got your wish," she said as she rolled over, "I'm out of cucumbers for the year. I thought we could celebrate my impending absence!"

She had a neat little sandwich tucked in a brown paper bag, and she began munching on it while I remained still.

The corners of her lips perked up, "Come on, admit it. You're going to miss me."

"Cucumbers." I shook my head and sorrowfully glanced at the final cucumber. She burst into a fit of laughter and, strangest of all, I began to take part in this odd human behavior. Her chuckle quieted as she listened to my gurgling, bubbling one. Suddenly I paid attention to it myself. How despicable it was, how bizarre! And how lowly, for the guardian of this lake to sympathize with a human! I felt the blood rush to my face and attempted to rationalize, "You take care of this forest. Good human."

She blushed, "I... I try. I hope you haven't noticed too much trash. When I come out with the kids I make sure to have them pick up their candy wrappers, and when my friends come I remind them to bring out what they brought in..."

When she had finished her sandwich she looked sorry, but I dunked back under the water anyway. I observed her fold up her blanket, take her bag, and leave.


	5. A Long Spell for Thought

A Long Spell for Thought

* * *

She was true to her word. The forest cooled and the leaves were aflame, and then the frost, little by little, became ice inching across the top of my watery domain. No cucumbers. No yellow hair and navy overalls. No big blue eyes.

Frigid temperatures slowed me to an underwater crawl. I rested at the base of the island, watching my sluggish fish nibble at the seaweed, breathing in and out... and listening. Every morning, as foggy light found its way through the thick ice sheet, I would hear the clunk of heavy winter boots. And I knew it was her. Once I was shaken awake by the loud crack of ice breaking. I watched the hammer she sometimes held in her hand disappear to the surface and then let my eyes follow the gleaming hook which she cast down into the depths. I played with the thought of swimming over and pulling on it, but I could barely move as it was.

I pondered. Many cucumbers. A love of nature. A nurturing character. She was a strange human (stranger than the creatures generally were), but strange in an engaging way. The cold months dragged on, my thoughts floated and swam in one direction and then another, and I wondered.


	6. The Very First Harvest

The Very First Harvest

* * *

I was just beginning to feel my toes again when a cucumber floated through my field of vision. Through the wobbly surface I could see a world very brown and growing just a little green, and against the bright white and blue sky my eyes caught a blur of yellow. I swam faster than I could quite forgive myself for. She picked everything up as though it were only the other day.

"Kappa! This is the first cucumber of the year! My fifth year in Mineral Town..." The nostalgia in her eyes was intriguing.

Frozen months thawed in an instant, but for all the thought I had been giving this human, my tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth. Floundering for something as I held the cucumber in my hands, I found solid grounding in my old standby, "You're annoying. Don't come back."


	7. The Very First Water Lily

The Very First Water Lily

* * *

"I'm saving as many cucumbers as I can this year, so I can come see you everyday! Year round!"

The farmer girl glowed with pride. I noticed that her basket was filled with cucumbers, turnips, strawberries, and potatoes. Her delight was irritably contagious. But Spring was a joyful time for me anyway, so I attempted to shrug her affect on me off.

"Winter, no." I grinned.

She rolled her eyes with a winning smile, "Well, you'll have to count on that to get rid of me. Only the forces of nature will do it!"

She was about to walk away, but something in me would not let her go. "Wait."

The way her posture perked up, the speed with which she swiveled around to return to the lake side, baffled me. She laughed, "'Wait'! Don't tell me you aren't annoyed by me anymore! That wouldn't do!"

I grumbled, but it came out as more of a gurgle. I swam a few yards over to a field of lily pads and gently plucked a fully bloomed flower. I held it up to her, "First lily of the year. Like the first cucumber."

Instead of bursting into exclamations of gratitude and delight, her face shone with a quieter happiness. This startled me more than the expected response would have done. She tucked it behind her ear and thanked me. As she walked away, I realized just how early the lilies were thriving. A creeping, unsettling suspicion that my own warm state was translating into the lake swept over me, and I sunk into the water with a groan.


	8. The Girl Holds Her Breath

The Girl Holds Her Breath

* * *

She lingered by the lake after an afternoon fishing with her friends. The one with the pink hair almost kicked one of the fish, her brother used too much bait, and his wife almost left their egg salad on the bottom of the lake. She handled it all admirably. She had not thrown in a cucumber that day. I waited for the now daily offering, but she just sat on the shore and kicked her legs slowly in the water. Why? Why was she waiting? When I felt I had held my breath long enough I tried to ignore her, but I found that I could not. It was as if she had caught me fishing once again and the hook was tugging on my arm, turning me to her again and again. I swam underwater laps around the island, but there she still was.

Enough was enough.

I grabbed her feet in my hands and pulled her into the water. Even in the water she was laughing, big clear bubbles of air bursting from her mouth. I had let go of her immediately, but she insisted on swirling and twirling about in the water next to me. I knew she was running out of air, and so I pleaded to her with my eyes, glancing repeatedly to the surface. She shook her head jauntily, her yellow locks floating all around her. A strand ran down my shoulder and I pulled away quickly.

Enough was eventually enough.

She resisted my tugs on her arm until I truly feared for her safety, and then finally we flew to the surface together. She sputtered and gasped while I glared at her. When she finally recovered enough to stop coughing, I found myself speaking sharply, not with authority but with an unnerving feeling of concern, "Why would you hold your breath? Humans need air like fish need water."

She was embarrassed and still catching her breath, "I didn't mean to stay down so very long... It was just fun. To have you come to me and for me to insist on something from you... for once..." She found her rucksack beside her and rummaged in it until she came up with a cucumber. She handed it to me and before I could go gave me a second one. "Another apology, for being so foolish."

It was almost summer, but still the water was warmer than it should have been at that time. When she was gone and I touched my cheeks, I felt helpless and enraged. I spent hours swimming around the island and picking through the seaweed looking for garbage, but the lake had another guardian now. I even sat on the island in the cold night air, but nothing helped.


	9. In Quite the Pickle

In Quite the Pickle

* * *

After that day I only stayed up long enough to deliver my common refrain, "You're annoying. Don't come back."

The farmer girl's shoulders always drooped when I would surface with only those words. Her big eyes seemed more anxious than usual. I could not relax and the fish were suffering for it. They swarmed me whenever they could to support me and get me to fresh waters, for themselves and for me. But to no avail.

She was noticing how the lake was changing and told me in the snatches between my reply to her gift and disappearing once more that she had been doing more research. She could not find the answer.

And then, a day passed with no cucumber. And another. And another.

I could almost taste bitter salt in the water, and I began panicking. What was happening to my lake? What was happening to me?


	10. The Goddess Speaks Her Mind

The Goddess Speaks Her Mind

* * *

A bright flash dazzled my already dazed mind, and suddenly the Harvest Goddess was resting against the foot of the island beside me. She turned to me and said, in her voice strong and unaffected by the water, "Kappa, I have waited too long to step in. My apologies."

I shook my head but it dizzied me. I put a webbed hand across my face.

"Kappa, listen to me as closely as you can. Claire has been talking with me, since she is also one of my favorites, and I realized how dire the circumstances have become. If you do not stabilize your relationship, this lake might not be the only victim of it. She has even confessed her love for you to Carter, my priest in the village... Oh! I had hoped that you might come to me with your own feelings, but I should have known that it would not be in your nature... Allow me to give you the blessing I gave her, so that you two guardians of Mineral Town and the nature all around it might marry and thrive."

The water around my face was getting saltier and saltier, and I realized that tears were squeezing from my pained eyes. I nodded slowly so that my headache would not worsen, but as I continued to bob my head it became easier and easier, and the water began to clear of salt and sediment. The lake was recovering, I was recovering! In my confused state I caught the Goddess's smile, just before the blinding flash rippled through the water.


	11. The Plumed Proposal

The Plumed Proposal

* * *

By the hour, the minute, the second, the lake was flourishing once more. The water lilies were blossoming faster than I could keep track of, and the fish were bouncing through the waves. The morning dawned a soft gold and pink and the afternoon stretched out temperate and beautiful. Suddenly the sun was not the only yellow wobble of color above the surface. A blue feather unlike any I had seen around the forest dipped into the water. I swam slowly to the surface and cupped my hands to catch this odd offering, and as soon as I touched it I knew.

I glanced up and could not tear my eyes from those big, moony blue ones. I somehow managed, "Yes. I will marry you. Now don't come back," before swiftly diving into the water and racing away. I could not swim fast enough to escape the overjoyed laugh with which she, Claire, took this acceptance of her proposal. I was drawn to the surface again and I allowed a small, gurgling laugh before submerging myself again. I found I could not suppress a smile watching her cartwheel and skip her way from the lake.

It struck me only then how bizarre a couple we would make. Surely it was against nature. But the Harvest Goddess, the one who reigned over nature, encouraged it... Perhaps, far from being against nature, it would be a union embraced by it. The guardian of the lake and the guardian of the field... Truly, it could be a blossoming, thriving love... I laughed at the word, and then energetically swam around the lake taking account of all of the positive transformations and changes.

The only damper on my mood was realizing that Claire had neglected to leave me a cucumber. And then, as if on command, a cucumber swam past my eyes and onto the lakebed. Tied to it was a little note which read, "Sorry! Third apology is the charm! Love, Claire."


End file.
